Inside every older person is a younger person wondering "What happened?" (Particularly timely after my birthday this week.)
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Remember, half the people you know are below average.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have enough film.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
A day without sunshine is like... night.